by Judith Florian
1. In today's world of email and spam filters, bounce-programs, ISPs' white-lists and black-lists, thou shall not accuse anyone of "never answering" an email. The person probably did not get it, even if thou assume he/she did and just ignored it.
2. In today's ever-changing ISPs, thou shall not ever believe the last email you had for someone (even your mother) is the same email address now.
3. As my grandmother taught me 40 years ago, thou shall not send a snail-mail letter to someone asking for genealogy/family information unless you include a SASA (self-addressed stamped
envelope), and be thou prepared to wait several months for a reply.
4. As my mother and father always taught me, thou shall not be demanding when asking for the favor of information, and thou shall always remember to say "Please" and "Thank you."
5. As my teachers taught me, thou shall not cheat, or steal another's work, even if the other person only did part of theirs or never finished their project. Thou shall not "copy" work without
giving proper credit as a "thank you." Some copied work also requires thou seek permission from the other person before thou can copy it.
6. As my daughter taught me, thou shall not believe everything that comes out of a child's mouth. Although today thou child might say "I'm not interested in genealogy," give that child 40 years to mature and he or she will become very interested.
7. As other researchers taught me, thou shall not give up if thou do not find an ancestor in the record thou expect to find information. Instead, thou must search many different ways and many records to find just one mention of your surname.
8. As my sisters taught me, thou shall not engage in picky squabbles about "who is right." Inevitably, thou will likely find there are always two unproven stories and two sides to every
person's life.
9. As surprises in research have taught me, thou shall not ever believe all you hear or have heard. That Great Uncle who "left to become a missionary" might have instead done his "work" under a
bridge and "ministered" to his peers with a liquor bottle in his own hand.
10. As taught by practice and experience, thou shall not shun reading and seeking original sources. Reading old newspapers or even scribbled notes has the effect of teaching thou about an individual, a group, and even the community.
11. As taught by life's hard spots and hard knocks, thou shall never be ungrateful for what is given thou. Thou shall be grateful many times over when what is given is "FREE."
12. And lastly, thou shall not ever talk badly about anyone thou meets in life. Genealogy teaches
that thou may end up learning five years later that the person thou maligned with your tongue is indeed related to thou too! And, thou will learn maligning anyone is awful business if that
person happens to have ALL the family records you need.
Two others thou might benefit from knowing:
1. Thou are NOT required to include all the "sins," failings, misdeeds, bad acts, and numerous marriages and "illegitimate births" simply because "they are the facts." Thou's family and extended family is the only one thou will have; there is no reason to hurt someone (or their descendants) under the banner of presenting "the facts."
and
2. Thou shall learn through genealogy to love your family and extended family, realizing thou is just as human as each of them, and that thou may have made worse mistakes than the other person made had thou had lived that person's life.
By Judith Florian, who gives thou my permission to copy and quote these as long as thou includes these last two lines.
